S4 | 15: Insignia

The day I chose my values over survival

I’ve never shared this publicly.

May 2024. Uyo, Nigeria. Over a thousand people packed into a hall for an event I’d been building toward for months—Growth Masterclass.

What they didn’t know: three weeks before the event, I’d been fired.

I’d worked that job for three years. The salary made everything possible. It was the only reason I could even consider hosting an event of that scale without sponsors breathing down my neck, demanding their logo be plastered everywhere.

I hated that. So I decided to fund it myself.

Every naira I’d saved went into that event. The plan was simple: my monthly salary would rebuild my savings in two months. The math worked. The vision was clear.

Then the termination letter arrived.

Suddenly, I was faced with a choice that would either validate everything I claimed to believe or expose me as someone who only practised excellence when it was convenient.

My team and I had already committed to best-in-class everything. World-class speakers. Premium hall. Aesthetic design. Flawless execution. We weren’t settling for “good enough for Uyo.” We were bringing Lagos and Abuja standards to a city that deserved them.

Now I had two options:

Option One: Scale back. Cut costs. Hold a decent event and keep some savings after being unemployed.

Option Two: Go all in. Host the best-in-class event exactly as planned. Live on the edge for however long it takes.

If you attended Growth Masterclass or saw the photos, you already know which choice I made.

I went for best in class.

Five months of financial discomfort followed before I secured another job.

But here’s what changed in those five months:

Excellence stopped being something I practiced and became something I am.

It became an insignia—a signature, a mark, a non-negotiable identity.

I chose excellence at my own expense.

Not for applause.
Not for recognition.
Not because anyone was watching.

But because back in 2018, while still in university, I’d established five value systems that would govern how I moved through the world.

• Honor

• Humility

• Diligence

• Discipline

• Excellence

Pulled this from my old Evernote app from years ago. Made some updates as I grew.

I’d written them down. Declared them over myself. Made them the internal compass that would guide me when no one else could see.

And in May 2024, those values were tested in the most uncomfortable way possible.

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How I Arrived at This

Years ago, my mentor told me something I’ll never forget:

“Carry yourself with excellence and dignity. Behave in the ways of kings.”

One day, he looked at me and said, “Iron your bedsheets. Iron your underwear.”

I thought he was joking. He wasn’t.

“Even if nobody sees them,” he said, “you’re reinforcing a lifestyle of excellence and cleanliness internally.”

That’s when I began to understand what it means to have values you actually swear by. Before I stepped foot on campus in 2018, I’d already written down my five-star value systems.

(Evernote screenshot)

Every morning before I entered the university gate, I’d pull out my phone and read them. A quiet ritual. A daily reminder:

These are the values I will live by today.

That was how I started planting the seeds of good values in my life.

Small. Daily. Intentional.

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What Are Values?

Values sit above habits, below principles, and control behavior when no one is watching. Your values are your gatekeepers. They are not what you admire. They are what you refuse to violate, even when violation is convenient.

Values are chosen standards that force life into an intentional shape instead of a reactive one.

Imagine this:

You’re walking down your street. Someone approaches. Before you can react, they slap you across the face. Hard. For no reason.

Your next move—whatever it is—reveals one of your core values.

If you believe in “an eye for an eye,” you’re justified when you slap them back.

If you believe in pausing, assessing, understanding—asking yourself if this person is mentally unstable or just having the worst day of their life—you’re justified in that, too.

Your value system is your internal compass. The reason behind your choices long before you ever consciously made them.

Most people go through life without ever sitting down to define their values. They never ask themselves:

What do I want to be known for?
What will people think of when they hear my name?

They drift, react, and survive.

But they never architect their own identity.

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I Used to Have Anger Issues

Growing up, I inherited a short temper from my DNA.

My father had one. It was a family trait. A default setting I didn’t choose but absorbed anyway. One Sunday, walking back from church, a close friend looked at me and said,

“In your family, you guys have a very short temper.”

My siblings attended the same church. He’d seen it in all of us.

I was pissed.

But in that moment, I made a decision:

I will never be known by this trait.

From that day forward, I started taking deliberate steps to change how I responded. People will always get you angry—that’s life. But your response? That’s the only thing that matters.

I became conscious. Intentional. Ruthless with myself.

Now, years later, it’s extremely difficult to make me angry. And when you do, my first response is silence. I don’t speak until I can respond without emotion.

That didn’t happen by accident. It happened because I chose a different value system and refused to let my biology dictate my behavior.

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You Have to Be Intentional About Your Insignia

We all pick up habits as we grow. Some from nature. Some from how we were nurtured.

Maturing is getting to the point where you select your own value systems and establish a personal insignia with which you move through life.

What will I be known for?
What will people think when they say my name?

My friend Paul taught at the masterclass last week. Every single person who knows him can tell you two things:

He understands and practices honor.
He’s a master of relationships.

For me, I know one thing people can say: I have an unmistakable passion for personal growth. (Feel free to share your opinion in the comments.)

Your insignia is something you curate and live by long before the world recognizes it and labels you with it.

You must carefully choose your values.

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How to Choose Your Value System

Whether you’re doing this as an individual or building culture in an organization, the best value systems are personally driven, limited in number, behavior-focused, and stress-tested in real life.

They aren’t democratic at the start. But they become lived culture over time.

Here’s how you create yours:

Step 1: Start with a Comprehensive List

Use a list of over 50 values—accountability, authenticity, courage, gratitude, integrity, curiosity, family, growth, etc.

Circle 10–15 that resonate deeply when you read them. Values that feel essential to who you are, not what you think you should value.

Step 2: Narrow Ruthlessly

Whittle it down to 3–5 core values.

Ask yourself:

• Does this value define me at my best?

• When I’m living this value, do I feel most aligned and purposeful?

• Would this serve as a filter for hard decisions?

• Is it non-negotiable, even if it becomes a disadvantage?

Step 3: Define and Operationalize Them

Write a personal definition for each value.

Then list 3–5 specific behaviors that demonstrate what it looks like to live into that value.

For example, if one of your values is courage, your behaviors might include:

• Speaking up in difficult conversations

• Taking calculated risks

• Standing alone when necessary

Make it concrete. Make it measurable.

Step 4: Test and Live Them

Use your values as guardrails for daily choices.

Review them periodically and ask:

Are they still guiding me effectively?

Values aren’t static. They evolve as you do. But the core, the essence, should remain.

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This Is Your Arena

Day 15 of 100 Hours of Personal Growth.

Mahatma Gandhi once said:

Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.

Start with your beliefs. Let them form your values.

If you don’t believe in excellence in the first place, you’ll never risk anything to practice it.

Selah.

No days off. Stay strong.

— Multidimensionally yours, JG

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PS: Do you feel someone else needs to read this post on the value systems? It struck a chord, and you want to be kind enough to share it with them? Please go ahead.

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